This is me when I was 21-years-old. It seems so long ago that I was this girl. I would like to tell my 21-year-old self to chill out and enjoy life. I was much too serious for my own good. But I was also very driven which is something I lost for several years. I guess life gets in the way of our dreams sometimes.
When I was 21, I wanted to be an actress. This was one of my headshots – I couldn’t smile because I had braces. I remember that day – I was so excited to be working with this great photographer in downtown Houston. It was such an amazing day because I was surrounded by creative people – being on set is always exciting. There was the photographer, myself, and a makeup artist. I loved being around such amazing and talented people. To this day, I still get giddy when I am surrounded by anything creative whether it is a movie set, a photography studio, or a dance studio. It truly makes my heart sing.
The pictures were so expensive, but I was so proud that I paid for them myself. I waited on tables like so many actresses do. I lived at home, so I was able to spend all of my tip money on acting classes. I ended up dropping out of college to follow my dreams. I worked, went to acting classes, and auditions. I really was having the time of my life. I ended up getting out of acting but still wanted to work in entertainment. So that is what I did for many years. I even moved to Nashville, Tennessee to do just that. I ended up going back to college to get my degree but still maintained my dream of working in entertainment.
I would like to say to my 21-year-old self that I am so proud of her for pursuing her dreams – I never really thought about how brave I was. It just seemed so natural to follow my path – it was all I ever wanted growing up. I didn’t have much growing up – my house was not a happy home. But I always had my creativity and dreams to get me through whatever turmoil I was going through at home.
I lost my dreams a long time ago because of so many things that got in the way. I feel like I am that 21-year-old girl again – the one that had so much determination and so much tenacity. I am just a little older and wiser. I can’t explain what it feels like to lose your creativity – it is like the sparkle and passion was taken out of my life. Like my spirit had been stolen. I am so happy and at peace with my life right now. I am so thankful and grateful for that.
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